A Gentle Sell (08.18.16)

Challenge:  Sell something to a 30-something fitness conscious male...

Being a woman in her early thirties, I appreciate that you are into sports and traveling. Being health conscious is a very attractive trait in men in their thirties. However, as much as I appreciate such men, seeing them support FitBits and Apple Watches also show off their lavish lifestyles and materialistic personalities. Or, worse, their inability to create their own path and a rather, undesirably passive resignation to "follow the herd.”  

Which is why I hope you'd consider the BioRing. It's small, non-intrusive to your wardrobe, and quite an easy-to-understand system. Not only does it measure your steps and general health, the ring sends updates to your phone about more detailed vital information in your body as you function throughout the day. From sleeping to working out to eating, the BioRing allows users to utilize the newest technologies and sensors to understand their bodies better. You can wear it wherever you go, it matches everything in your closet, in and out of water, and the ring looks good on both males and females.

This simple fashion statement says more about you to yourself than any others out there.

To check out the product, please go to:  https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/bioring-the-personal-trainer-on-your-finger-fitness-gadget#/ 

<><><>

What do you think? Did I gently sell it?

I've been asked why I went for the gentle salesman approach and that's a style I've discovered most people respond to. Most people don't like people yelling or talking AT them, which is why the gentle salesman approach is usually the best. The item is not cheap but it lasts a lifetime and, from what I think, most athletes would love this app, but selling it to the common man out there, one has to be coddled a bit before making such an investment. Right?

There's also the fear of turning them off to the item. The more aggressive approach, though quite fun to make, would also make them aware of the plenty of other options available to them, not to mention, beg the question as to why they would want to impress a woman like myself. Such an approach can seriously torpedo a sale... Truly, believe me on this. 

Long Distance Savior (08.17.16)

Good day all!! OMG!! I hate playing the field as a woman. Do you have any idea how terrible it is to do it as a woman that men find another slab of meat?! ... It's terrifying and really sad because of those who call and those who don't.

Anyways, on August 10th (2016), HE sent me a lovely message in Chinese on OkCupid but I hadn't read Chinese in so long, I didn't understand a word of it. And because OkCupid wouldn't let me copy the message into a translator, I asked him to translated it into English. He responded kindly and then I asked to WeChat because it has a built-in translator. (Woot!)

We started chatting and everything he said slowly sewed up my broken heart. Each compliment, each line, each run, I couldn't help but feel seduced and enticed, until I found myself falling, gently, for this man from Hong Kong. So far away, and yet, he was closer to me than any man had ever managed to get.

I went from seeing 7 men at the same time, all in rotation, totaling 9 total in my lifetime... after being active on the dating scene for... 1.5 months... Yeah... FAST!! and loose... and I hated it!! but it seemed to be the only way to find someone...

One week was all it took for me to consider him seriously for marriage. I eliminated all others for him... Seven days were enough to test our feelings, connection, and strengthen our love. It sound silly, it's ridiculous if you think about it, and yet... it's strangely the only thing that's keeping me afloat.

Did I mention he's coming out to visit me in September? To meet my family and friends... To date me and get to know me enough... so when I go visit him, I can meet his parents and friends in October... so... yeah... :)

Upside... Many connections in HK want to work with me... but he's my first priority if this pans out...

Wish me luck?

WORST FIRST MEETING/DATE EVER!!! (08.01.16)

I'm new to online dating as a more physically active person, now. So... bear with me on this. 

I’m still getting a sense of when someone is lying and when they’re honestly looking for a connection. I’m not one to judge based on ethnicity and religion, but I know what I want and what I don’t want. I want a man who is confident in himself to carry himself with grace, chivalry, and honesty. I don’t want a perverted excuse of a man who is just looking to hook up under the pretense of looking for something more. Aren’t there enough of those guys in life already? Geez.

So, a guy likes my OkCupid profile and starts chatting with me. We get along because I get along with everyone, and exchange numbers. We start texting and decide to try to meet on the same day. I think it’s fast but he promises no monkey business, just a meeting, nothing more. And I think, “Okay, this guy can’t be so bad.” So, I agree to make the drive out to him because he has work… blah blah blah…

First sign of something not right, HE SHOULD HAVE COME OUT TO ME OR MET ME HALFWAY.

Before meeting him, when I went back to check out his profile, he had deactivated it. And when I asked him why, he said it was because he was talking to me. And… well, as sweet as that could have been, that made me feel like he was hiding something. I felt nervous and anxious but told myself that it was sweet that he was so focused on me, when in reality, I felt irked by this.

Second sign of something not right, I FELT IRKED AND YET, I STILL WENT OUT TO MEET HIM.

Right, so, the drive took over half an hour and he called me to ask where I was. Right? Why was he so fidgety? Shouldn’t he be the confident one? … Bad feelings from his voice, too…

Third sign of something not right, I FELT “UGH” FROM HIS VOICE… SERIOUSLY!! Should have turned around!!

I arrived on time and parked. The guy was halfway down the street and tried to kiss me upon meeting. Physically, I was disappointed, but I thought, maybe he has a sparkling personality. I mean, isn’t that why we stick around if there’s no physical chemistry? Well, he led me into a lovely complex and to a bench by a man-made pond where some ducks and turtles swam. Along the way, he told me the last relationship he had was 8 years long and it had been two years since she ended it with him for a richer man. At that moment, I was actually ticking off my list of annoyances and he was getting a very high score. Geez… but, okay, maybe further conversation could make things better, right?

Fourth sign of something not right, WTF! WHY WOULD YOU KISS SOMEONE YOU JUST MET WHEN TRYING TO SEEK A LTR WITH THEM??

I was so wrong!! We chatted but thirty minutes in, I felt NO chemistry and was actually feeling more and more repulsed as he tried to move closer or chat. I could tell he only had ONE THING on his mind, this coming from a man who had just been telling me how much he longed to be in a long term relationship, and how he was willing to go slow because he wanted to be invested in the relationship part, not just the physical. The last straw was when he kept talking and I felt like being physically sick just to get away from him. I thought I let him down gently by telling him that I don’t feel any chemistry with him. He snapped and got up, saying, “Damn waste of my time,” and walked off.

Fifth sign of something not right, HE LEFT ME THE MOMENT HE FOUND OUT I WOULD NOT PUT OUT. WHAT AN ASS!!

Not knowing my way back to the front gate, I followed, as he repeated, “If we’re not going to hook up, damn waste of my time…” Right? From a guy who was looking long term, not just at the physical, and hoping for something more. So he murmured on how I can get back to the front when I asked and then walked off in the other direction. I walked a bit lost, and had to ask a kind elderly woman for directions. She gave them to me beautifully and simply. When I got into my car, I drove off, shaking my head at how poorly I had judged this guy.

All in all, this was my WORST EXPERIENCE because he was physically, mentally, and psychologically not what he tried to come off as through OkCupid and text. Physically, okay, editing sucks for this reason. Mentally, all he wanted was sex but used the LTR lure to bring me in. And Psychologically, he was quite unsound. He mentioned doing a sport and I think he may have been traumatized by it because he wasn’t all there. Sure, he could have been nervous or shy, but to give off such strong vibes that disgusted and revolted me from the few moments we spent together, I’d never felt so… nauseous.

It’s sad, but, I can see why his former left him. Based on this short encounter, NOTHING would bring me to unblock his number of contact him again. I mean, yes, eventually, I want a LTR with a man who is confident and physically/mentally/psychologically sound and stable… but this man was ALL WRONG for me. Ugh. Even thinking of him now makes my throat want to close up and my stomach want to purge its contents.

Seriously… LADIES AND GENTLEMEN who are on online dating websites… BE CAREFUL!!

Life Struggle (07.26.16)

"Treat others the way you want to be treated." ~~~ Should I, now, start throwing people under the bus? 

I have always struggled with this "golden rule" because everyone else seems to know it but not act accordingly. If my friends mess up, I will cover for them, even at the expense of some acquaintances. But, more often than not, I find that when I mess up, I'm thrown under the bus by the very same people I defend wholeheartedly. 

Most recently, I was told I could partake in a delightful snack that was stowed at my apartment. And partake, I did, for two weeks, the delightful snack saving me from some hot days and tough hours. And when my roommate returned to find it gone, she told her significant other who had originally stowed it our our place, and had invited me to partake. -- The thing is, I know I was wrong to not replace it immediately, but I claim ignorance in thinking that they would be back for it for they never stated such intentions. Proof? ... They left without saying anything. 

But, I had thought, FOR SURE, my roommate, being my friend FIRST, would do what I would have done. If I were her, I would have bought the replacement delight snack and given it to my boyfriend, while giving my roommate (me) the receipt to pay me (my roommate) back. Sure, a bit more work for my roommate, but it would maintain the peace between all nations. Instead, she chose to rat me out and make the situation uncomfortable for 3 people, not just 2. 

How, then, is this "golden rule" beneficial to me? ~~~ The sad truth is that, it is not. 

For as long as I live, I am doomed to be the loyal dog to everyone and I have no one stand up for me. I think for others and care for their well-beings, naturally, even if it requires more work on my part. You may wonder why I didn't replace the delightful snack immediately? ... I couldn't find it at Stater Bros., 7-Eleven, CVS, Rite Aid, and Vons. I planned to venture to Ralphs tomorrow, but she returned with the news before I could head over there. She couldn't even think to warn me, HER ROOMMATE AND FRIEND FOR YEARS, before reporting the incident to her boyfriend of less than one year. 

This is the friend I live with; the person I trust with my life and safety. ~~ As of now, I feel none of those previous sentiments for her. I question what she has told this boyfriend, who is a stranger to me, and how he sees me because of this incident. Not only that, I don't trust him now. What's to stop him from warning my roommate against me and anything else that could be seen negatively? Of all people, I know that: if there's a will; there's a way. If he doesn't think my roommate's stuff is safe here, then one word and she could be moving elsewhere and leaving me high and dry. I don't think she would ever do that, but I don't know for sure... do I? I mean, she's proven that her loyalties lie elsewhere. 

Why, then, do I bother making friends? Am I not alone, then, in this endeavor called 'life'.

...

If anyone has advice, please... send it my way. I'm not suicidal... but I'm not fine either.