BAD clover DATE with a Racist Pyramid Schemer

I wasn’t going to post this. I was going to let it slide. But, in the end, I just can’t because there are still people out there doing things like this to innocent good-intentioned girls looking and hoping for love. I almost laughed when I heard that the pyramid scheme was still around. I worked really hard to clear my life of a lot of crap and ended up where I am now. I’m ready to date and get on with this thing called life… So, I checked out Clover, a dating app because a friend recommended it to me.

MAN!! I should have known better! Dang it!!

First guy that responds to being matched to me asks if I want to make money this Summer. And… surprised as I am, THAT is NOT how someone interested in getting to know you in a romantic way talks to you. From that moment, you are a mark and nothing more than a possible business opportunity. But, I wanted to believe that he was shy and looking for an ice breaker, maybe, and who isn’t interested in making money? Right?

WRONG!! Once a mark, always a mark.

The fool is a racist! OMG! I thought Asians being racist was sooo old fashioned and not of my generation, but he said he was born and raised in LA… then HOW THE PUCK is he still racist? If he had issues with that, MOVE TO ASIA!! But, I’m sure he can’t because he doesn’t speak the language… he speaks English! Damn, I was so mad because he was, basically, calling ALL of my friends stupid people. So, as if that wasn’t bad enough, I was hoping meeting with him, I could clear the air about his racist point of views… HAH. What a joke!

I met the guy, he brought me into his life with a sop story and then pitched to me a pyramid scheme. I was amused at first and wanted to see how far he’d get before I shut him down. He said it would be a 15 minute meeting but by the 15^th minute, I was ready to crawl into my bag and hide because he hadn’t even started his pitch yet!! All of those past memories of being tricked by the pyramid scheme came back to me, so I stopped him and shut him down. He took the rejection as any man would, and dared to insult me to my face by saying, “I thought you were brighter than this.” The dude insulted my intellect when he was the bigger chump! Wow, so I critiqued his methods and pitch because, to be honest, he sucked at it. If my words could hurt him so much, he shouldn’t be in the scheme!

He also claimed to be Christian after being brought back to life after a motorcycle accident where he was at fault. He decided NOT to wear his helmet while riding through the Malibu Hills at night. He crashed into a car head on and ... God brought him back to life. He is a Christian now because he is a miracle and etc... That was his sop story to me. Of course he wouldn't know about my trials and tribulations. He never asked about them. All he wanted to do was make me feel bad and sad for him, thinking that would open me up to him, so he could pitch to me and get me on board. I'm sorry, dude. Jesus doesn't work that way. You better rethink trying to use Him to fish me in. Cuz, I ain't biting!

On top of that, when he saw he couldn’t change my mind, not that he really tried, he packed up his set up and left. There was nothing courteous or kind about him, just a business sleaze ball moving on to their next mark. Also, he didn’t speak like he even liked what he was pitching. He kept telling me he loved the program without a smile nor any excitement. He kept telling me it was the best option for me when he knew nothing about me. And when I pointed this out to him at the end of our meeting, he said he tried but I was too “closed off”. And I take issue with that, because I answered all of his questions with honest answers about myself. That jerk didn’t even listen. He didn’t even recall our Clover chat conversation until I recited it to him verbatim. Then, he got defensive and… I was so thankful he left. I was going to forget about it…

AND THEN… Monday morning, the morning after the afternoon of our meeting, he sends me a text at 4:50 AM that read, “I hope you know why you always get the friend zone?”

…

…

Here was my text response with screen-captures of our conversation on Clover:

“(Photo) There are a few things we should get straight. The first thing you as is if I want to make money. No good guy talk[s] straight business. You never had interest in me, [NAME]. You saw a mark and took it. (Photo) Then, you went all racist on me. After that, you only kept up with me because you want[ed] to make more money. And… I said I was friend zoned to be nice. It’s never good to brag. And I wanted to [get] to know you so I kept the meeting. I hate the pyramid scheme. I hope you don’t get hurt. Please block my number.”

So, I blocked that racist fool stuck in his pyramid scheme and… onward, ho!

***

For all you Pyramid Schemers out there… as someone who has pitched to hundreds of people successfully… let me teach you some things… and take it however you want to:

Lesson #1 – People aren’t stupid. Just because you have an emotionally trying story about a difficult time you went through, it does NOT mean I will care any more about what you’re selling to me than if you told me there were ants on the ground. Your story is sad and I feel for you, but the moment you switch over and pitch to me about the pyramid, you better have a good segway… or else, I’m out. I’m not stupid. Come on, now!!

Lesson #2 – People aren’t racist anymore. WE LIVE IN A PUCKIN’ MELTING POT!! Once you insult your mark, it’s over. Regardless of whether or not I choose to meet with you or not, it was all for my entertainment, to be honest. I lost some time because of it, he got nothing out of it, but I got a good story to tell and writing material.

Lesson #3 – People aren’t nice. I am the nicest and most friendly person you will ever meet. Telling me I’m “narrow-minded” and not “bright” to my face is just asking for a tongue lashing. I carry Mace for that reason. So, I can save my breath and just spray away. I also carry a beating stick for my protection from the creeps the pyramid sends to me. So, be forewarned… there are meaner people out there than me… and they WILL not care how sad your creep’s story was.

As I wished for him, I hope you don’t get hurt. 

On a more serious note...

RIP and my condolences to everyone who lost someone recently and attended their funeral this weekend. Death is never an easy thing to get over and handle as a teen or as an adult... Be sure to remember the experiences you shared... and Love every moment of your life, live life to the fullest, and lose no time worrying about what can be... My prayers are with you and your family.

Where have all the STRONG MEN gone? (04.18.16)

In some ways, I feel like Christian guys are worse than non-Christian guys in the sense that, Christian guys don’t know how to properly say no to a girl. Whether or not this girl is interested in them in a romantic way is irrelevant. Christian guys simply don’t know how to say “no” properly. This is based off my recent encounter with one on an online dating site/app (which shall remain nameless). I’d been on for a while, as an upgraded member, I want to take an advantage of it, right? So, I’m just chatting regularly with mostly randoms who only last a few weeks in conversation. Once they realize they can’t meet me to hump into the sack, that I require intelligent conversation and a friendship first, they often go their own way and delete my message thread. Yup! Short, simple, and to the point. It’s come to me checking my “sent messages” before I check for new messages. I want to see who looked at me and then deleted my message as opposed to read my note and then deleted my message. It makes a difference. Not too sure how just yet, but I know it does.

Okay, so you’re asking where I’m getting my Christian guys are worse than secular guys argument and here it is! Most non-Christian guys delete right away or after a few moments. That’s just how it is. It’s quick, merciful, and a swift rejection. This clown that I’m chatting with about our common interest is responding minutes after my responses. We’re jiving, chatting, and really getting along. And to be PERFECTLY honest, I only sent a message to him because he wore a Nikon camera in his profile pic! As if you couldn’t tell by my profile and social media, cameras are my THING!! Come on, now. And I know he checked out my profile. In fact, I’m holding my Canon 7D in one of my photos! I can’t be more for-reals jived to see a fellow photog enthusiast like myself on the site! And, well, although he’s DEFINITELY NOT my type of guy, I wanted to make friends and see if we could swap shooting secrets! And as we’re chatting, it’s so fun and he likes to shoot on 35 mm film, so that’s a trip for me! Gosh, I can’t even tell you how great we were jiving, so I asked if we could meet and talk about it in person noting that our meet would NOT be a date.

He didn’t respond within 7 hours… And the app showed that he read it right away. My response is “JUST SAY NO THEN!!!” Why the puck are you making me wait and think the world of things?! Why can’t you be the Christian man you claim to be in your profile and just give a straight answer?! What is the harm in telling me, someone who NEVER expressed interest in anything other than your photog skills, that you don’t want to meet up and chat about more photog stuff? Are you afraid I might react negatively and plead with you? Because I won’t. Weren’t you Bible-based, boy? Why aren’t you referring to the Bible in this case? Do NOT lie! Tell truth!! Come on, just say “NO” and adding a “thanks” is just good manners!

I’m so annoyed with this because, for a Non-C to do this, okay, I get it. Different morals, different upbringing, different culture, of course he will beat around the bush… But for a Christian guy to do the non-Christian guy thing… It’s no wonder they’re so weak… I’ve rarely felt protected around certain male Christian friends and it’s for this reason. No isn’t that simple to them… it carries sadness, hurt, resentment, self-punishment, and the like. So, they give other reasons and such. As for me, I LOATHE guys like that!! It pisses me off because when did Jesus ever say “Well, um, I don’t think that…” Some would argue, he never said “No” but I argue that he straight up told you what TO DO  and what NOT TO DO. There was no “I think you might want to consider selling most or all of your stuff” to the rich man. He told that man to “sell” and “follow”. Right?!

OMG. I’m going to have to respond to the poor conflicted guy who is trying to find a good way to say “No” to me. I just pray that I have the patience to write it before deleting his message thread. And I just hope to God that my future husband will not be so wishy-washy. There’s nothing more frustrating to me, a filmmaker and writer/director, than someone who can’t say “NO” directly. There are far fewer problems and issues if you do the simple thing. Think of all the hassle and trouble you’ll save yourself if you’re direct without adding on weird and unclear excuses.

So, to all the Christian brothers out there who want to say no to something or someone… JUST SAY NO!

***

In the end… I guess it was my fault for thinking I could make a friend or that he’d be more straight with me. I guess, a real flaw of mine is that I think all Christians are straight forward like how I am when it comes to making decisions. Apparently, it seems, I’m still more of a “man” than the men in this religion. It saddens me that many Christian men are still so weak and powerless in the conflicting world we live in. … Sigh. So sad. 

Fickle Friendship (02.17.16)

Friendship, I have found, is a very fickle thing. I’ve met strangers I could rely on more than friends of friends, which makes me wonder just how they think and operate. I’ve been burned so many times in friendship, I feel it is my job and duty to make others aware of just how aloof some can be when faced with the opportunity to help or ignore someone that is connected to them in some way. And for privacy purposes, I’ll not name names, but if they read this, I’m more than sure they’ll know who they are. And, again, this is a discovery post for me, about how I think completely differently than they do.

For those of you who don’t know me, just know this; I’ve never been in an intimate relationship, so all I’ve ever had were friends. So, I treasure these friends very much. I treat them like kings and queens because… they are all I have. And I believe in treating others the way you want to be treated. It doesn’t mean they have EVERY come close to how I treat them, but I still have hope that… maybe one day, SOMEONE will. However, having friends is special. Having none is lonely. Less painful, but also more quiet. So I choose to have friends. Maybe that’s where my thinking become so warped?

I recently learned that I treat strangers and non-direct friends better than I ought to. One example came from a recent hope of an adventure I had. I wanted to create a difficult custom designed cake that required baking knowledge and so, I asked a friend of my sibling’s for help. The person could do great things! I’ve witnessed it and eaten it before! This person agreed and then, after a few emails, this person just ignored me. I felt a bit hurt, brushed off by someone I thought I could trust, but then, I guess, this person was a relative stranger to me. If it weren’t for my sibling, then I wouldn’t know this person. Regardless of how close this person is to my sibling, that person obviously felt no connection to me.

So, it was my fault for putting so much hope in this person. I’d forgotten about how different of an person I am. For me, if a friend of my sibling asked for a favor, I would be gung-ho until the very end. I would offer up my services in every way, shape, and form, because they are friends with my sibling.

Another example comes from a wedding I once pulled out all the stops for. With a three camera set up during the service and two traveling cameras during all other times of the day, throughout the different events, I could have easily charged $1k for the whole shebang, even it being my first full wedding package. Instead, because the bride was one of my sibling’s best friends, I busted my butt from 6 Am until midnight, and was given a red envelope of $20 at the end. I was so speechless, I was so hurt, I was so humiliated, I didn’t know how to handle it except to swallow it.

Final example? A friend of mine moved recently and though I tried to help, I simply didn’t have the time. There was a miscommunication and that left a staleness in our friendship. I was confused because, when I see someone moving down the street, or what not, I usually offered to help if they needed it. Even in the Church I grew up in, we were taught to help others without complaint nor resentment. I’ve helped more people I didn’t know move than I care to remember. It was just the fact that I was fulfilling a need. That’s all.

I asked friends if my way of thinking was an American way of thinking and most of my Asian friends said yes, whereas my American friends simply told me I was just too nice. But… isn’t that how the Church raises the children to be? Have unconditional love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control?

So, this weekend,  I will venture into the cake making adventure on my own with a friend who is as ignorant as I am, and hope for the best. I can’t blame others for not helping me because they have no reason to. We think differently, therefore, the only hurt is me.

Is that right? Am I missing something?

So, please, for everyone who reads this… please be aware that some of your friends are as “too nice” as I am. If you don’t want to help them, TELL THEM DIRECTLY. Like me, I won’t know even if you ignore me because I will always give you the benefit of the doubt and think that you’ll get back to me as soon as you can. People like me… we get hurt much more often than you think, by people just like you. And yes, it’s our fault for being “too  nice”, but that’s the way we were raised. As much as I want to say no, if I CAN help… I always will. And when I get underappreciated or brushed off, I will believe that it’s my fault. And I will forgive you.

Because to me, everyone is a friend. Everyone who needs help should receive it. … Right?